One night a few of us were here at the office, and the topic of bad Presidential hair came up and we got a bit carried away with ourselves.
[Ladies or gentlemen, why are his eyes always so white? Does he not know how to blend his foundation?]
If Joe Buck was calling Trump’s hair, it would be going from first to third on blooper to right. Martin Van Buren is widely considered as having the worst presidential hair in history. I mean … damn! Legend has it he used to comb that shit with a pork chop.
But then we noticed that it was like Trump’s and Van Buren’s hair seemed to almost need each other. “Marty-baby, where have you been all my life? Super.” Can you think of any other Presidents with awful lids that deserve a Trumping? Let us know.
UPDATE: While John Quincy Adams’ mug may scare small children and Nixon’s lid was not entirely dissimilar from Trump’s – difference being Trump combs his back hair forward and Nixon his nostril hair back – there really isn’t another president with worse hair than these two nudniks.
John Quincy Adams – Little scary but he was a great Pres. so he gets a bit of a hall pass. I will say this though, if he was ever happy, he should have told his face.
Richard Nixon – He rocked front-to-back, like a catcher trying to throw out the runner stealing second – Resigned before Congress could impeach, try, convict …
Trump – Back-to-Front – If you play Trump’s hair backwards, does it say, “I am not a crook, I am not a crook …” over and over?
Donald Trump-Grant – We gotta say, even the elderly hobo look is a step up. Grant’s beard and crow’s feet seem to impart, if not a measure of wisdom, at least a couple IQ points.